Things People Say (pt 2)

As promised we move on the the next installment of our series. This one is probably the most intriguing to me for a number or reasons.

A beauty young lady is excited as she just found she was having a baby girl

[Female] ooh congratulations. Is this your first child?

[Young Mother] Yes it is!

[Female] How far along are you now?

[Young Mother] I am about 23 weeks now.

[Female] Oh ok, Just wait to you get further along and bigger, you’re going to get so fat…

END SCENE

I will never claim to figure out women but I do know that there are things you shouldn’t say that any person especially women at certain time about certain things .

This blog will feature things that have been said to us during our pregnancy (which is still on going as we are 39 weeks). Now I know some people were trying to be helpful and I completely understand that. However I honestly wonder if we think before we speak BUT I will let you see if I am being to harsh….

Now I must say many of the quotes I am going to write to you we look back on and laugh about. They weren’t funny at the time but are quite funny now.  Honestly I don’t know what people were thinking when they said them but out of their mouth these words fell. Majority of the people were women. In fact I’d say about 70%. This surprised me at one level because for the people who were pregnant before and had kids I couldn’t imagine these words feeling good to them if said so why would they repeat that to a new mom.

You’re getting fat
Are you having twins, (After we told people we are only having one child), you sure you’re really big
How are you feeling? (Good) You sure? (Yes) I was miserable at this point give it some time…
Your hair is so nice that will go away once you stop taking prenatal vitamins (um she had nice hair before ).
Looks like you put on a few pounds
You’re getting fat (someone actually yelled that out)
How far along are you? (seems like a harmless question but when we were under 36 weeks we would hear horrible stories about how someone’s child, grandchild, neighborhood friend or whoever was born at that time. Side note any baby born before full-term has a higher risk of not surviving.

Now maybe this doesn’t really sound that bad but let me tell you for new parent’s hearing this stuff over and over (and remember this is just a snap shot) it is like WOW… REALLY.  Most comments are encouraging or supportive just this. It is almost like people are saying this was a miserable time in their lives.

For my wife and I we decided to make this the best time it could be… Sure there are some challenges.. Many in fact. But that doesn’t mean we couldn’t enjoy the journey. I mean think about it at the end of it all we would have a child! Isn’t it worth it? We had to keep out eye on the prize so it speak. Carmen is due to come any day now and we can’t wait… BUT timing isn’t the most important fact. The most important fact is that she comes! That we can wait for.

As for the comments about her weight and things we look back now and laugh… Can’t believe people say things like that but they make for great stories… They don’t realize that my wife worked out like crazy before she was pregnant and will resume after Carmen’s born… But that’s a conversation for the next post HA!!

Thanks for reading once again.. If you like what you see keep peeking around, feel free to share a thought, or even subscribe! Hope to hear from you soon!

Merry Christmas

As the evening comes to an end, I sit back in my chair, laptop on my lap and the reflection of the Christmas lights fill the room as they blink to various songs that play…

I am left to reflect on my wonderful day filled with laughter and powerful moments that are now memories.

Christmas isn’t just about feeding our faces. It is a time in which we reflect on the birth of Jesus (yes we know he WASN’T actually BORN on this day). The reality is we should be reflecting on this truth everyday. Today we should be celebrating in a more grand way. Many of us take the opportunity to connect with family or loves ones that we miss throughout the year.

I pray that you took time out to tell someone you loved them, to show someone what that love meant, and how deep that love goes, because that is the meaning of Christmas….

How do you enjoy this special day? What are some traditions you and your love ones enjoy?

Merry Christmas from the Anderson family!!!!!

CRAZY dreams!!

Have you ever had one of those really crazy dreams that when you woke up you just thought they were real?

That is exactly what happen to me today as I was enjoying my day off nap. This is the nap I tend to take, on my day off of course, making up for any sleep I didn’t get during the week.

Now for the dream….

It was about my daughters first moments being born

I remember the doctor holding Carmen and saying she’s all your’s mom, and handing her to my wife… I grab the camera and turned into the paparazzi. I snapped picture after picture of this cute little beauty laying on her mother. I captured her mother who was a in state of shock but still beautiful herself.

I remembered fast forwarding and having Carmen in my arms as I slowly paced around the hospital  room. It was so unreal. My wife fast sleep in her bed as I had sung to both of them in order to keep them both from crying (can’t quite remember why though ).

It was so real and awesome. I couldn’t see her face, and couldn’t smell her (smell is a HUGE identifier for me, my wife as a very distinct smell, and I LOVE IT ) but so many other things were real. Our doctor was there, the hospital was the one we will give birth at, but the mystery of who my little girl will be is still there and you know what…. I am perfectly ok with that.

What kind of crazy dreams would you like to share?

WATCH OUT- New Parents

We can officially say now that next month we will be holding our baby girl. I am very excited about this!

However the strangest thing I have had to deal with is the amount of negative conversation surrounding my daughter before she is born. Now let me explain what I mean by negative conversation. People often tend to want to tell you the worst stories they have when you tell them you are about do something they have done? So since every knows we are having a child I have heard all sorts of stories about child-birth and raising kids.

Many of these stories have been rather interesting because they have been short of a Stephen King novel. In fact after I shake off terror that is on my face I then try to think why did they tell me that story again and I can’t seem to find the reason. One person may try to “help” by saying that people do this in order to prepare new parents for the harsh reality of raising a new-born. Nonetheless how you say things is truly important.

The taste that can be left in the mouths of new parents is that their children will be the worst decision they ever made.

The truth is that although life will change in a NUMBER of ways life is still very AWESOME! We need to spend more times talking about the pleasant changes that will occur. Now I am not saying that will ignore or be in denial about the challenges of raising children. BUT I am saying that instead of just running of the list of complaints that one can have because of a “crying, pooping” kid we should think of all the joy that child has brought us and share those truths with others!

Now I am not always perfect at this BUT Ephesians 4:29 tells us to

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”

I really want to be mindful of what I share with people who when they walk away from me they feel  more encouraged by what I said. I am not perfect in this area. When it comes to the journey of our pregnancy we have been able to be honest with each other about how we feel each step of the way and every time we have walked away feel prepared to do this together.

The reality is that at one point my wife and I didn’t know if we were going to be able to have our own children so we are grateful for this moment in our lives! There are people who are able to experience what other complain about.

Be mindful of what(and more importantly how) you say toward others for you may only have a small understanding of how large of an impact it has on their life!